Sunday, July 18, 2010

First Day

i'm sitting at my desk tonight listening to the rumblings of thunder and watching the downpour of rain and hoping that this dreadful weather is not an omen for the next leg of my career. or maybe i should think of it as a palate cleanser, allowing me to walk into hart 302 tomorrow with a clean slate with a new opportunity to prove myself. or...maybe a thunderstorm is just rolling through the district.

whatever the literal or existential reason is, tomorrow will be the first day i call myself a health legislative assistant for senator klobuchar and actually have the business cards to back that up. taking a walk down memory lane...remembering the surprise i felt when my dad woke me up one morning to tell me i had been accepted into grad school, and then the angst that came with employment (though it was just an internship), and also the elation i felt after seeing years of hard work actually paying off...i found myself thinking about which adjectives i'd be using to describe the next part.

everyone has been asking me whether or not i'm excited to be starting a new job, and to be honest, i can't say that i am...or at least not in the same way i was when i first moved to dc or when i was hired by senate finance. this move, though new and respectable, almost felt as if it came out of necessity. not being able to advance myself further, i was forced to take the opportunity. and though it is definitely a move up and will be immensely beneficial to my career as well as exceedingly humbling, i feel disappointed that i didn't make this move completely by choice or desire. but regardless, i take my full dedication and energy with me and will exert all i have to ensure my success, to make this all it can be and take all it will give in return.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Nostalgia

there have been a lot of change these days...birthdays, weddings, new jobs, new lives. but an invitation that arrived in the mail several months ago indulged me in a few days of the past. an old friend from years past was getting married...and i happily took this opportunity to see some great friends from a former life.


i've never been great at maintaining old friendships. my modus operandi is to develop a great group of friends everywhere i go...claremont, san diego, dc...but somehow i tend to only have the capacity to hold onto a handful of lifelong friends and regrettably, i lose touch with lots of others. and after making this trip back to california, seeing some of my old friends, i realized that i really missed that life.

dinner with lil sibs, drinks and a impromptu visit to napa with a great friend, reminiscing with old roommates, and wedding date with an old crush...it was all just a little bit surreal.

maybe it's hearing what all my old college buddies have been up to in the years that have gone by, or realizing i'm at the age when friends of mine start getting married and having kids, or that i've taken responsible steps to improve my career/life even if i'm not as confident about it. but as much as i move around and go down paths i never thought i would have, i still have to think...change is hard.